Monday, November 24, 2008

Connecting with Mom Friends

During my adult years I have always been business oriented, I didn't get married until my late 30's, and didn't have my son until I was forty. So most of my friends were women with older children, or women without children, and as much as I love them for what they provide in friendship, they aren't at the same place that I am in regards to juggling a career, a relationship with my husband, and a toddler.

So it was so refreshing to go out to lunch with a friend that is at a similar place in her life. I met her while I was going through my infertility treatments. She and her husband were taking a medication class at the same time my husband and I were, while on our the first round of treatments; and then we reconnected, when the four of us showed at at another higher level medication class for further rounds of infertility treatments. The chances of us meeting again were millions to one -- and at that moment we knew there was a reason we were meeting up again. From that point forward we kept in touch as we both managed the process, and found ourselves pregnant at the same time, with each of us delivering a son within a 45 days of one another.

Since then she went back to the fertility clinic to get pregnant for a second time and found herself carrying twins, stuck on bed rest for the last four months of her pregnancy, and is now juggling three children under the age of 2.

And although we hadn't seen each other in many, many months (bed rest, delivery and recovery) as soon as we saw one another for lunch today and started talking, it was as if it was yesterday that we had seen each other. Our lives are so similar in the challenges that we face with raising little ones, managing our personal relationships, and keeping our sanity.

As our time together came to an end, neither one of us wanted to leave and get back to our lives, the camaraderie felt so good.....having someone else to talk with that really understood what you were going through. I know I am not the only one that craves that female friendship with other moms who are on the same level, going through the same challenges and finding compassion in like minded moms.

To all moms out there I wish for you a group of like minded women who you can talk with, share with, compare with, and raise your children with. Having friends is the best -- but having mom friends makes the journey even better!!

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Talking Over Toddler


I can remember thinking when Zack was just a baby, that I couldn't wait until he could talk. I wanted to hear what he was thinking, have discussions with him about the world and everything in it, and listen to what is important to him. Now as he continues putting words together, I am amazed every day at how much of a sponge he is, soaking up everything around him, and what a great memory he has.

But the downside of that is, it now becomes difficult to talk around him!! When I am trying to have a conversation with my husband, or talk on the phone, he wants to be part of everything going on and it can sometimes cause breakdowns in my adult conversations.

Yesterday was a perfect example, my husband took the day off from work to get some odd jobs done around the house, and later in the afternoon while hanging out with Zack, we were talking about our upcoming schedules when Zack interrupted to say "No talk mommy, no talk." I stopped in mid sentence and stared at him. I was amazed, and dumb founded; he isn't even 2 years old yet and already he is starting to dictate to me!!

The balance now becomes helping him to maintain his strong willed, outspoken personality, while not having it lead to bad habits. With parents every day it is a constant struggle to guide their children, create boundaries and not stiffle their personalities.

It also forces me to figure out ways to not have a break down occur in my adult conversations as well because those relationships also need to flourish. Striking a balance!!

Friday, November 7, 2008

What Parents Should Know and May Not (FM)

This show hosted two nationally known experts in Alexis Martin Neely, a family legal expert and family wealth advisor, and Dr. J.J. Levenstein, MD, Pediatrician and founder of the company MDMoms. They have a wealth of information to share with new parents and they will both be regular contributors on my radio show.

For Alexis Neely, author of the book "Wear Clean Underwear", www.WearCleanUnderwear.com after reading her book I felt an immediate call to action regarding legal steps to protect my son. And I knew that the information she was sharing was knowledge that every parent should know and probably doesn't.

What happens if something fatal happens to you, the sitter or nanny is watching your children, you can't be found and your spouse is not easily accessible? Does your sitter have authority to take care of your children for the immediate time frame? And where are your documents naming a guardian for your children if both you and your husband happen to pass away at the same time? Do people know where to find those documents?

All are real serious questions that Alexis shares in her book, as well as on my show, along with 6 mistakes that couples make. Check out Family Matters on WebTalkRadio.net for crucial information that every parent needs.

She will also be on my show again soon talking about what a Personal Family Lawyer is and the benefits of hiring one to help your familly.

Then Dr. J.J. covers topics for new parents regarding issues with feeding a new baby, jaundice, cradle cap, ways to help your child from having a flat head, and what to look for if your baby is constantly spitting up. Tune in!

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Going Green for Baby (FM)

It seems that everywhere you turn you are encountering ads for eco-friendly products, companies that are becoming more eco-sensitive, and suggestions as to how you can live more eco-responsible.

For this show I brought back The Baby Planners (www.thebabyplanners.com) to talk about how the baby industry was expanding by leaps and bounds in this area. And how new parents are making an effort to "go green" with their baby, because of their baby!!

They shared what they have learned by working with "Green Experts" in this industry, as well as some of their favorite organic, natural and sustainable products available for newborns. You can also check out their Ultrasound blog on their website to get more specifics.

Then Missy Adams, a Greening Your Nursery Expert from Seventh Generation shared her company's new collaboration with Healthy Child, Healthy World to create an eco-friendly diaper bag with 100% of the profits going to educate parents about environment safety. Missy also discussed 10 Green Nursery Tips.

I was very impressed with Seventh Generation -- in the products that they have created for baby such as chlorine free diapers, wipes and specially formulated Baby laundry detergent, and for their cleaning products for the home. I also appreciated their mission of being "the trusted brand for your living home."

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Domestic & International Adoption (FM)

While there were 4.3 million births in the United States in 2007, about 20,000 of those children were adopted domestically, and another 20,000 children were adopted from overseas. So I wanted to talk about adoptions, the differences in domestic versus international, as well as the changes in certain countries now being closed for adoptions from the U.S. based on the Hague Convention. I talked with Rick Gibson with the Children's Home Society and Family Services Organization who has partnered with over a dozen countries to find loving homes for their children. He shared with me that Ethiopia and Russia are more open to U.S. adoption, while Guatamala and China are either closed or are slowing down the adoption process.

Jeanne Tate, an adoption attorney and founder of Heart of Adoptions also enlightened me about the huge number of children available for adoption through the Foster Care System in the United States. Helping these children is a passion of mine. When I lived in Florida I worked as a Guardian ad Litem, representing kids within the foster care system makings sure they received the services they needed and pushing them through the system faster. I then created a non-profit organization called For The Chidlren, to help children get adopted out of the system by creating a color catalog showing their beautiful faces that was distributed all over Hillsborough County, Florida. This was back in the early 90's before foster care had any marketing programs in place.

It seems, however, that although more marketing programs are in place, there is still a breakdown in helping prospective parents adopt these children out of the system and give them the loving and supportive homes that they truely desire.

Right now approximately 125,000 children are available for adoption in foster care and it doesn't cost anything to adopt these children, versus the thousands of dollars involved in a private adoption. Plus, the government is also providing tax credits, taking care of the cost of a home study, and funding for college tuition.

Contact Jeanne Tate to learn more if you are interested in adopting a child, want to provide a loving home to a child and really make a difference in their life!(www.FloridaAdoptionAgency.com)

Monday, November 3, 2008

Let's Talk About Sleep (FM)

Sleep is a common topic of coversation for new parents. Questions such as: Are you getting enough sleep? Is the baby sleeping through the night? How do I get my baby to sleep a solid 8 hours? And are you irritable and less patient because you are feeling sleep deprived?

To discuss this topic I brought on Gina Reilly, owner of Night Nannies for Newborns (www.nightnannies.org), a service that works night shifts taking care of the new baby and allowing parents to get the rest they need. When people hear night nannies, most think of a Baby Nurse -- but this position is different. Gina discussed the difference and spoke about how many clients have told her that her service "has saved their marriage." Because without sleep many overwhelmed new parents, find themselves fighting amongst themselves and causing undo conflicts. She also talked about how Night Nannies can assist new parents in learning how to teach their chidlren to sleep through the night (an added bonus).

So instead of new parents having to cope with sleep deprivation, possible conflicts in their marriage, and having their child not yet sleep through the night, a Night Nanny may be your answer.

Then Kim West, a Baby Sleep Coach, known as The Sleep Lady (www.TheSleepLady.com)shared several methods that she has developed to reteach babies to go back to sleep when they have disrupters interfere with their sleeping patterns. A few examples could be when a baby starts teething, or after having their schedule interrupted because of traveling, or due to an illness.

I know that with my son, he has changed his sleeping patterns many times over the last year and a half, and it always helps to have a resource that you can tap into for direction on keeping everyone on track.